Style Conversational Week 1181: At least this election offers lots of parody material Parody whiz and theater buff Matt Monitto wore his costume from a local production of "1776" in the video he made of his "Alexander Hamilton" parody. See bit.ly/invite-hamilton. (Screen shot from his video) By Pat Myers Pat Myers Editor and judge of The Style Invitational since December 2003 Email // Bio // Follow // June 23, 2016 Hey, we have 2,400 words of Style Invitational today with Week 1181, with 16 fabulous song parodies about this election season — and that doesn’t count the rest of Matt Monitto’s “Hamilton” parody, which you should definitely catch on video . So honestly, I’d rather you spend time reading (and listening along with) them than using up your time on this page, and so I’ll try to control my yakking here. As always, judging the parody contest was time-consuming but a thorough blast — there were so many clever, witty, funny songs (I didn’t count the entries, but there were 181 separate submissions, some with many songs) from a variety of song genres. YouTube is always open on my computer during the whole judging period, and I listened along with clips to every song used that I didn’t know intimately; some were totally new to me. I happen to be very familiar with all the songs for today’s inking entries, but that certainly hasn’t been the case every year. The only bad part of judging this and other parody contests is that I can’t possibly run even half of the inkworthy songs. To enjoy these parodies as a reader, you can’t just eyeball them as if you’re reading paragraphs or lists of jokes; you really do have to listen to them in your head (or with your ears), line after line. Several people sent me huge, full-length parodies that matched the originals — often rock or rap songs — line by line (sometimes using many lines from the original song to show how well it could be applied to the current season). They were often well done and imaginative, but they should really be performed, not read; not only don’t I have the space (if I want readers to read anything else), but honestly, they become a bit tedious to just read. People who sent me these, you should record them! Share them on the Style Invitational Devotees Facebook page, where I’ve been sharing non-inking but fun parodies for the past several days. I’ve read that the Major-General’s Song from “The Pirates of Penzance” is the most often parodied song in English. I have no idea whether that’s true, but I can tell you that I’ve received multiple Major-General parodies in just about that every parody contest I’ve run. But I very rarely give them ink, because they rarely are funny and clever enough to justify their substantial length. And they need to at least match the cleverness of the 1879s original, which holds up as funny light verse even today. Nan Reiner dressed up all Yankee Doodle for the several Week 1177 parodies she recorded. See bit.ly/invite-myturn for her runner-up effort, and you’ll see the others as well. (Screen shot from her video) I got an MG parody this time from one non-inking Loser who appended this comment to his own effort: “The lyrics don’t really fit the melody and rhythm, but no one remembers Gilbert & Sullivan anyway.” Well, fortunately Matt Monitto does, and he gives a clinic here on how to Major-General, filling the 12 lines of eight beats each with zingy wordplay in almost perfectly natural syntax, with no contrived re-accenting of words, and with flawless and clever rhyming. When I got to the penultimate line, “My Donald-centered plans have left the voters in excited states,” I groaned a little, thinking that this wonderful song would end anticlimactically with the predictable “United States.” But nope — Matt gives us a punch line: “So soon I’ll be the president and run these Disunited States.” Meanwhile, Matt, who’s been doing a lot of community theater at home in Connecticut since graduating from college a couple of years ago, borrowed his costume from “1776” to record himself doing his “Alexander Hamilton” parody ; he sure does Miranda right. One good thing going for Major-General in the Invite is that people know the tune. Which made it suitable to run in the print Invite, which of course has no links to help readers with the melody. I used that criterion as well in selecting the three runners-up; while of course /some/ people won’t know “Let It Go,” “Smile” and/or “My Way,” I can at least hope so. (Only two honorable mentions fit on the page along with them, First Offender Maria LeBerre’s “Donny Boy” and Stephen Gold’s take on “My Favorite Things.”) Like Matt, runners-up Nan Reiner and Barbara Sarshik are bulwarks of the Invite parody canon, each of them delivering several spot-on songs this week. But it’s the first parody ink for Jerry Birchmore, and also his first “above the fold” out of his 14-blot total. Jerry lives in the D.C. area, but I don’t think he’s ever come to a Loser event; I hope we’ll meet him soon. *FEELING SOLENOGLYPHOUS? SINK YOUR TEETH INTO WEEK 1181* It’s the third go at our contest for poems using words plucked from this year’s National Spelling Bee. In combing through the play-by-play of the 39 rounds that once again couldn’t bring either of the two final competitors down, I aimed for words that weren’t difficult to explain, and ones that a Loserly-minded poet might work into some verse form of another — and manage to make it funny. It’s worked in the past: We first did the bee-words in Week 716; the results are here (scroll down past the Week 720 contest). Here’s the winner, classic Brendan Beary: */Acariasis, a mite infestation:/ * I’m sad to say my grandpa Zacharias is, Alas, no more. The doctor has suggested The cause of death was likely acariasis; With tiny parasites he was infested. The wee arachnids he indulged with bonhomie, For piety was one of his delights; Remembering the book of Deuteronomy, He loved the Lord his God with all his mites. Then we did it again a year ago, in Week 1129 : This is Chris Doyle’s winner, a double dactyl: /*EPITHALAMIUM (EP-i-tha-LAME-ium), a song composed for a wedding:* / Higgledy piggledy Iggy Azalea Rocks out her wedding to Nick in July, Rapping her vows in an Epithalamium: “Beg for it, baby, from I-G-G-Y.” Okay, it’s not a contest for Your Mama jokes, but there’s plenty of fun to be had. Note once again the rule that you have to use the word in its real meaning, as above. You’re free to use whatever form you like, as long as it doesn’t go over eight lines. As in almost all light verse, the use of “perfect rhyme” rather than “near rhyme” makes it much more clever. The Czar of The Style Invitational, who did me the favor of writing this week’s example, said that if he were running this contest, he’d insist that the spelling bee word be made to rhyme in the poem, as his “ptyalism/ nihilism.” But he’s not; it’s nifty to do that, but not necessary; I’d certainly have hated to toss Chris’s double dactyl above, for example. *LOSERFEST CONTINUES TO FESTER! AUG. 25-28 IN PITTSBURGH * Loserfest Pope Kyle Hendrickson has busy digging up avariety of offbeat activities (between the procession of restaurants) for the Loser Community’s field trip; he’s arranged for a special rate at the Omni hotel right downtown. The Royal Consort and I will be going up on Friday; you can see that there will be plenty to do if you make it a shorter trip. Megabus has a line that goes straight from Union Station to downtown Pittsburgh for a variable but usually dirt-cheap price (when I used it, it was $10). For more info, see the website Kyle set up atloserfest.org , and sign up here to be notified of updates as plans develop. *LOSERS IN PARADIS(O): BRUNCH THIS SUNDAY* I have to be elsewhere this Sunday, but the huge, delicious buffet set up at Paradiso awaits the Losers at noon as they’ll gather at this regular spot on the brunch rotation. RSVP to Elden Carnahan at the Losers’ website, nrars.org (click on “Our Social Engorgements”).